People always tell me how lucky I am. I have the best parents and great friends at school. I have good grades, too. But I ...

Advice Asking Eric: A friend’s need for help is overwhelming to me, but I feel guilty about distancing myself Published: Jun. 15, 2025, 2:00 p.m.

Asking Eric: Hoarder’s friend wants to help but doesn’t want to shame How can the letter writer help a friend who is a hoarder without making her shame worse?

In this Asking Eric, readers navigate the delicate challenges of helping a friend struggling with hoarding, decide how to handle one-sided long-distance friendships, and hear sage advice on finding… ...

Advice Asking Eric: Hoarder’s friend wants to help but doesn’t want to risk piling on shame Published: Jun. 12, 2025, 7:00 a.m.

Dear Eric: I have a friend of several decades and recently learned she is a hoarder. We always met outside our homes for coffee or lunch. I just assumed it was more convenient.

SELF’s ‘Asking for a Friend’ is a new, monthly advice column where therapist Miriam Kirmayer answers readers’ anonymous questions. Here’s how to submit yours.

Dear Friend: There are avenues for help but, as with any other compulsive behavior, she has to be willing to take a step toward them. You might give her the book “Buried in Treasure, Help for ...

Dear Eric: I have a friend of several decades and recently learned she is a hoarder. We always met outside our homes for coffee or lunch. I just assumed it was more convenient.

Dear Not Ready: Being proactive will really help you and Betty here. Reach out to Betty first and tell her that you’ve ...

Tips on ghosting a new friend vs. a lifelong bestie will look pretty different. So help Dr. Kirmayer understand your particular relationship by including this information.