“When [your friends] are grieving … it’s important for [them] to know that they have someone to talk to and turn to ... him or her that you would be sad, too, if you were going through ...

That people are unsure as to how to behave around someone who is recently bereaved ... I am here / I am a phone call away if ...

Most people can be helped in getting through their moment of crisis if they have someone who will spend time with them, listen, take them seriously and help them talk about their thoughts and feelings ...

When someone has lost a loved ... of feelings one day but want to talk about other things the next," says Vollmann. "If they are in the mood to be silly or sad, whatever it may be, go with it.